Counseling can treat mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression, or ADHD, in addition to everyday concerns, such as relationship problems, stress management, career ambitions, or other issues that affect a person’s well-being.
Each relationship is different and comes with its unique challenges. Living and moving through time with another, even the one to whom you were given in marriage, is often difficult.
Specializing in Marriage/Couples, Elderly Issues, Pre-marital, Budgeting & Financial Matters, Divorce Adjustment, Communication, Blended Family Issues, Crisis Management and more.
From the Blog
Healthy Ways to Deal with Heartbreak
9 Healthy Coping Skills to Deal with Heartbreak
1. Crying is a healthy release because holding all those emotions in is not healthy. Crying is a key trigger in the release of endorphins which are the bodies natural pain killer and feel good hormones. Tears can also detoxify the body and improve mood.
2. Journaling feelings can be very beneficial because it allows your feeling to have a safe place.
3. Boundaries with ex: no social media stalking, block him on all devices, limit all contact
4. Focus your energy on a healthy outlet, hobby, exercise, friends. Exercise is an excellent de stressor because it releases various chemicals like endorphins that help with improving mood. It also delivers oxygen through your body that provides energy and you will sleep better
5. Make an appointment with a counselor to process your emotions
6. Focus on rebuilding your self. Expose yourself to new people, challenges and experiences.
7. Fill your life with positive people, music, books, movies, podcasts.
8. Volunteer-allows you to focus outward instead of inward,
9. Do not isolate.
Help! I am Stuck in Overwelm
Many times people in our life can overwhelm us and place unreasonable expectations on us. This happens in relationships, friendships, work places and activities. One way to put things in perspective is to write out what is important and priority to us. The next step is organizing our time based on our priorities. During this time, we can determine what are necessary and healthy priorities in our life and what needs to be cut from our list. It is important to develop boundaries for our selves. We control what is acceptable and manageable and what is not.
Managing Marital Conflict
Many marriages can suffer because of the inability to resolve conflict in a healthy, calm manner. In the many years I have worked with couples one of the major components of conflict is not validating what your spouse says. For instance, a person may come home from work and share how their day was very frustrating and everything that could go wrong did that day. The person just wants to come in and vent and be validated that their day was awful. However, their spouse starts providing solutions on how it can be better tomorrow. In those instances that a person just wants to share their terrible day it would be beneficial to say “I hate that you had such an awful day, I am here to listen”. That statement is two-fold it validates the persons experience and it offers support without trying to provide a solution.
Another component that can cause conflict in a marriage is not understanding or being clear on what your spouse is trying to communicate. An easy solution for clarifying what a person is communicating is to say, “ This is what I am hearing you say”, or “ I am hearing you say this and you seem upset”. This allows the person to clarify if that is not what they were meaning to say and be mindful of their tone.
One final way to resolve conflict is to create a safe word. The word can be anything you and your spouse agree upon. The purpose of a safe word is to use it if you feel yourself getting upset. This provides an opportunity for each person to calm down before talking about the difficult topic. One important tip is to create a time limit to talk again about the topic.
Helpful Tips to Resolving Conflict with your Teen
Benefits of Conflict Resolution with your Teen
1. Strengthens your relationship with your teen
2. Encourages communication and not confrontation
3. Teaches your teen how to handle conflict with others appropriately
4. Builds trust with your adolescent
5. Validates your teens feelings
6. Empowers Your Teen
Six Steps to Resolve Conflict
- Identify the problem
- Communicate clearly and calmly
- Allow your teen to express there feelings in an appropriate manner
- Brainstorm together for solutions
- Evaluate each solution
- Choose a solution
Clean Your Plate
We live in a world full of hustle and bustle and it seems everyone has so many hats to wear on a daily basis. The importance of creating boundaries with time management are essential is to maintaining a positive mental health. Our plates can become quite full that they overflow and it begins to trigger health concerns like stress, anxiety, sleep issues and exhaustion. Let’s explore ways to clean our plate.
- Purchase a planner to lay out your day, week, month
- Purchase a dry erase calendar board for your household, you can color code each person and list events, chores, etc. There are also several family scheduling apps that would also be helpful.
- Create a time in your week like an appointment for just yourself..quiet time, gym, walking, reading, etc
- Learn to evaluate what gets added to your plate and when to say no.
- Remove from your plate obligations where you feel overextended and overwhelmed.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help
On a personal note, I am a full time counselor, wife, mom and those are just three hats I wear. I have had to learn to use the techniques I mention above to clean my own plate. I have learned that self-care is so essential to maintaining a positive mental health.